Saturday, November 18, 2006

Enough Balls--Bring On The Boobs

I would like to gather the bra-makers of the world in a room and knock their empty little heads together.

I was going to clarify that my wrath was reserved for the makers of cheap, ill-fitting bras. But then I got all pissy that the good bras cost so damn much, so I'd like to crack some posh skulls too.

I've been bra shopping, can you tell?

I'd like to know why a band size can't be the same from brand to brand. It's a measurement! Why is one brand's 34 smaller than another brand's 34? And for that matter, I don't even want a 34--a 32 is a better fit, but they're impossible to find in the cheap section. Since my cup size is fluctuating on a pretty much hourly basis (due to that whole lactation thing), I refuse to shell out for a bra that will probably not fit me for very long.

Then again, maybe it will. I am currently wearing a bra so old and ratty that I feared it was going to just crumble into dust, leaving my boobs unfettered and unsupported. And dusty. Yes, I've definitely gotten my money's worth out of this one.

So that's one bra-maker who escapes the skull-thumping. The rest of them? A bunch of useless tits.


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